Random Thoughts

Seperti biasa siang ini makan sendirian. Panas. Milih ngadem kesamping kantor yang notabene Mall. Capek jalan-jalan akhirnya makan di salah satu fast food resto. Duduk dekat wahana kecil mainan anak kecil. Gak biasanya tu wahana gak ada yang mainin. Sepi. Sampai akhirnya ada anak kecil perempuan sekitar 4-5 tahun melepas sepatu sekolahnya dan langsung main. Sendirian. Tapi tawa kecilnya memancing anak kecil lain untuk ikut main. Gak butuh waktu lama sampai wahana mainan itu rame dengan gelak tawa anak kecil. Wahana simple. Perosotan. Tapi mereka bahagia banget.

Awalnya aku cuma merasa dapat tontonan gratis, ya namanya juga makan siang sendirian. I left my Blackberry and Android at office. Cuma bawa hp nokia senter. Which mean I have nothing to kill my bored time while eating beside watching kids playing around happily. Apa ya? Gelak tawa mereka tu magical banget. Suasana hatiku yang tadinya biasa aja cenderung hampir bosan bisa dibuat ikut tersenyum.

Terlintas pikiran, i want one of those. Bukannya pengen pesimis dengan hidup tapi entah mengapa aku merasa masih lama deh. Do I have a boyfriend? Yes. Do I love him? Yes. Do I want to spend my life with him? Yes. Do I want have his kids? Yes. But the truth is I"m scared. 

I just feel. Hmm.. Hard to say.

Balik ke gelak tawa anak kecil. Sebenarnya memiliki anak kecil juga gak selalu menyenangkan. Berdasarkan apa yang aku lihat dan denger sih. Jadi weekend kemarin seperti biasa ngerias keluarga yang mau resepsi pernikahan. Anaknya yang masih kecil tanpa henti menangis dan gak mau diurus selain dengan ibunya. Denger tangisan  histeris anak itu sebenarnya buat kepalaku sakit juga sih. Kemudian sang ibu mungkin secara gak sadar ngomong "duh aku stress". Which is buat aku itu manusiawi. Bukannya suatu hal baik buruk nya selalu berdampingan? Yup!

Tulisan ini sebenarnya gak memuat topik pembicaraan yang penting, cm my random thoughts. Anak kecil selalu buatku tersenyum. terlepas dari cantik, ganteng, biasa dari segi fisik. The most charming things of them are their smile and laughs. Senyum dan tawa anak kecil bisa membuat wajah cemberut dan pikiran ruwet orang dewasa segera hilang. I want have kid/s someday. And I hope I will having kid/s from someone who I love and Love me back equally or more :)

If I Can Turn back The Time

Couple of day almost new year and yes It's been a long time I don't write anything into my blog. Short talk, my life going well and freakin good this year. I couldn't ask for more even I will always hoping and do more than good for next year. This blog post just recapping what really happened in 2013.

I start with family. Everything is fine. My family was blessed of God's love. For Sure. Thank you Allah for this lovely family. Even though my father should retired of his job this early year but it's okay because his forth children already have their own job. Which is we are not overburden his responsibility anymore. He can rest at home and enjoy his retirement happily. End of year my mother got sick. But it's okay, I mean we all still optimistic that she will be recovery soon. Amin.

Friends. There is nothing I can tell about my friendship. Everything is goooooood. I mean really good and there is nothing I should talk about. I keep my social life really fine and safe. There is no drama about my relationship with human being. What can I say? I am such a good person :p

Work. I have two jobs. As an administration of telecomunication provider and Make Up Artist. My office mates and boss really friendly. I love working there. Sometimes I bored of this job because so easy. Oh my! but sometimes I really grateful. Working hours start 07.30 am but I arrives at 08.00 am. My boss not complain about that. At all! How amazing is that? Starting my day with breakfast and browsing many things. Full internet services. The site I always open is youtube, for sure. Once again my Boss doesn't complain about it. All he knows is my duties done perfectly. No call from main office for revision my work, all is fine for him. Then my job as MUA. Once again I grateful of God's Love. After I finished work, my clients always send satisfied messages. That is all matter for me, happy clients.Happy clients will spread good review for all their families and friends which is will be my next clients.That is true, mouth to mouth promotion is the best ever promotion methode.

Love life. Oh my,, this section maybe will be the longest paragraph. Maybe. So many things happened but I better keep it just for myself. I'm just hoping he will be the last cause took years until I can be with him.

Back to the main topic of this blog post, If I can turn back the time, what would that be?. I'm not gonna lie, so many mistakes I did this year. Of course I wanna fixes it.

*deep breath* If I can turn back the time, I (maybe) would back to when I was at Jakarta.For one thing I did, my life turn upside down so fast. My families and best friends regreted what I did but deeply my heart I always wishing that thing happens in my life. Stupid decision consider everything good I ever had and I switched it for something that totally risky.

Like I said before, If I can turn back the time, maybe I would fix it. But the truth is I would not do that. Life is about choosing. Bad or good in the future. Life is mystery. I'm sure I can handle everything right. Otherwise, everything happen for a reason.

That's all I can say this time. I hope for the best for next year. Not just for me but all human being. Always grateful :)

Gak Ada Yang Lebih Random Dibandingkan Hal Ini

Rasanya udah lama banget gak nulis sesuatu yang sedikit berguna bagi beberapa orang. Niat awal tahun pengen bisa share make up tutorial. Tapi ditengah jalan, banyak nemu kegiatan yang lebih penting *alasan. Malas sebenarnya. Klasik! Akhirnya nulis tapi isinya curhatan. Penting pun. Hahahha..

Aku merasa akhir-akhir ini hidupku berjalan dengan baik. Semakin baik. Banyak tersenyum dan merasa tenang. I feel so good. Much better.

In the end, I would love to say. I love Him..

Feeling Lost

Tuesday afternoon in my office, suddenly I wanna write something into my blog. Anything. Mostly of what I felt recently. Not like old time that I used always said "time flies so fast". I felt time flies so slow lately. I noticed this things about a month ago. Yeah,,, a month ago.

A month. Short time actually. Just 30 days. But I felt so long way to go. Sometimes I felt lost during that time. How could that be? I don't know. Maybe because I'm just following my routine life track. Daily life such as works, have a little chat with best friend, reading some novel and magazine, hangout, watching television, then go to sleep. Yeah! Not so special. My life got so bored and safe. That so I feeling lost.

Lost of what I wanna achieve in my life. Lost... Just Following my life like it should be. Following my life according my usual life track. Lost.. I was like living but no soul in there. But my days fulfill of smile too...

In a month, I learn to love again. Loving is something hard actually. Especially ever got painful so much inside deep heart. Yeah.. Hard! What is that so? You will know someday if you got the same pain like I ever felt. Hard to explain with words.

The truth is learn to love is the main cause why I felt time flies so slow. I hope time will flies so fast like I used to feel

Random Facts About Myself

Udah berasa lama banget gak nulis blog. Males. Belum nemu sesuatu yang pantas untuk ditulis. Belum nemu sesuatu untuk di share. Tetiba iseng dikantor, kerjaan belum menumpuk dan aku memamng suka menumpuk kerjaan supaya langsung dikerjain. Langsung diberantas habis saat itu juga. Ya karena  memang bukan tipe yang sangat rajin juga sih.

Iseng nulis beberapa hal mengenai diri sendiri. Hmm,, penting gak sih? Ya gak juga sih. But this is my blog, I wanna write everything I want as long as no one get hurts about it, so what?!

Talking To The Moon

Oh my,, it's like so long time ago I wrote something into my blog. So busy with real world. I've something to do and should be finish by end of april. I wish I could. Amin....

So, I found this song, Talking To The Moon by Bruno Mars. Not really new song from him. But I just Found it -,-

First time I heard this song, Somehow I remember of him. Someone who always come then go in my life because of some reasons. I understand the reason. Not angry or mad because no matter what happened he still my friend. Me myself not really sure about my feeling but one thing I know for sure is I miss him.

There is something of him that really different compare several men that I know. What is it? Let it be my secret :)

Sometime I wish I could say to him about what I feel but I just can't. My pride say no! Even I miss him so much.

'Cause every night 

I'm talking to the moon
Still try to get to you

 In hopes you're on the other side

 Talking to me too

Makeup Tutorial : Fresh Purple For Daily Look

Sehari-hari aku gak pernah pakai makeup, bahkan bedak tabur pun gak. Males dan letting my skin breathing easily everyday. Tapi aku suka main-main alat make-up. Liat dimajalah, cari inspirasi dan latihan untuk kerjaan selanjutnya. Masih harus banyak belajar. Akhir-akhir ini aku senang banget ternyata banyak yang percaya dan meminta jasa merias untuk wisuda dan nikahan. Teman-teman dan customer banyak yang bertanya bagaimana caranya merias, aku coba jawab sebisa yang aku tau walau belum sempurna. Semoga Tutorial ini bisa dipakai buat belajar.

Eyeshadow pallete dari Lt. Pro